That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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