Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Randomize
