toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Do vagina's smell?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
