Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
