Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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