Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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