I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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