Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize