Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
