I need help removing her.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
