3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Pappa wants mamma naked
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Randomize
