why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Randomize
