dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Randomize
