Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I'm sobbing to NWA
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Your penis caused this!
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
