i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
