I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
