Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
