So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
