I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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