Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
