Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
