Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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