I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
