what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
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