i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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