I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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