I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
