I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Is it because I queefed?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
