would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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