its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
