I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
this just has baby written all over it
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
