Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
