im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
