Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
