If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
