All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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