Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
