i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
