We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
You're completely useless in the revolution.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
