I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize