What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
