he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
