He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
