He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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