Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Randomize
