I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
