Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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