New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
