i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize