he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
